When the alarm goes off at night

In the Presidential campaign, Hilary Clinton used her famous, red phone ringing at 3am ad, that tried to make people worry about who would answer that phone, who was ready to deal with the problems, it was heralding. Funny thing, is we all have one of those 'red phones'.

In my case, it is a door chime.

We set up a door chime, where the chime, that makes the noise, is downstairs. The buzzer or ringer, is attached to a string, and we've given it to Mom. The idea being that if she wakes up at night, & needs help, she can just push the button on the ringer, that will make a god awful racket downstairs.

Guaranteed to wake me up, even David, who can sleep through about anything.

Tonight it went off.

It wasn't a serious issue, she was frightened by a reflection of light, against her mirror, and the laundry basket that was close by. It scared her, but let me tell you, it scared the crap out of me.

My heart raced, the chest became tight and I am just now regaining my breathing rhythm. It is my 'red phone' and I can honestly say, no one is ever truly ready for that ringing in the middle of the night, or at a time, when you don't expect to hear it.

Hilary Clinton was trying to score points, and she did, but I can tell her, right now, that as often as I have had my 'red phone' ring, you never get used to it nor are you prepared for it. You never get accustomed to it, and no, your head is not clear, but in a state of near panic. You are running, without even noticing, to get to the source of the ringing, you are sweating too, because you just know, in your gut, it isn't good.

Course, when you find out it isn't your worst nightmare, yet, you start to relax. Maybe you even get a bit angry at being summoned, for something foolish, but that fades with each ring you have to answer. Each time your 'red phone' bongs or shrills its demand for you, you stop worrying about the past, about any resentment, because you know, you hope, it is nothing serious, nothing that will test your will, your faith.

You also know, with a sigh of relief, that this isn't the time, once you are there, facing the caller on the red phone, but even as you feel the adrenalin retreating, the dread tries to leap forward, tries to take its place. In your heart, you know one night, it will ring, and it won't be a simple light reflection in a mirror, or a stumble on the floor.

One night you know your faith will be tested, your resolve, and you pray, as you walk down the stairs, that you will have the stamina, the courage, to deal with it. You pray, knowing too, that really, that is all you can do.

Who answers the red phone at 3am? The one who is there, who never wants it to ring, who knows it will, who can only pray, they can handle what lays behind the shrill call of the phone.